Hesitancy
by Kaoruko Hina
Summary: Scorp loves Lily, but he's afraid to confess to her, so he talks to someone who may help him a little bit.


Hey there! This is the first time i write a fanfic in english, and i know i will have some grammar mistakes, but I'm trying to learn, so i you want to help me with it, you should tell me in a review n_n

I hope you like the story and...enjoy!

PS: The characters are not mine, if they were, Scorpius and Lily would have been together from long time ago. I swear!

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We became friends a few years ago, when she was fourteen and I was sixteen. It was a strange situation, really. I was cleaning my broom when you came, pissed, and yelled to me.

-How dare you insinuate I'm in my Quidditch team because of my brother! You idiot! –she said. I got confused about that. She was Lily Potter, my family's enemy's daughter. Well, they're not enemies, actually, but the differences and the past between our families has passed, somehow, from generation to generation. Therefore I have never spoken to the Weasleys or the Potters, in fact, we always ignored each other, all these years.

So, if that is so, I really got confused about her behavior. I looked to her, calmly.

-I didn't say anything, Potter –I said. She pouted to me and looked to me like a monkey dancing hula hula.

-Mary Holdgarden told me so –she said, disconcerted –so you didn't say anything.

-No –I said. She sighed and sat down next to me. I was surprised, really surprised about her behavior –You…-she looked to me – You believed me.

She seemed disconcerted.

-Shouldn't I? –asked to me. I nodded and we were silent for a few minutes –Sorry about that, Malfoy.

I turned my head and looked to her.

-What about? –I asked

-For blaming you –She said, embarrassed –I think Mary told me that only because she was bored. I hate her.

I smirked to her, she was quite adorable like that. I made a hand signal, dismissively.

-Oh, I know her –I said –She's really foul. Don't panic about it. She uses to hate me, so…

-She hates you? –She asked, surprised –Why is that? –she immediately retracted –Sorry, If you don't want to tell me it's ok, after all, we don't know each other.

I looked to her and I really don't know what made me tell her my story, the stupid stoy about how I rejected Mary Holdgarden few years ago and she started to hate me because she get ashamed. I really don't know what made me smirk to her, but our friendship began that day and grew up since then.

At the beginning, it wasn't like a real friendship; It was more like a…known people relationship. But we had a few close moments that made us get closer, better friends. She grew up too; she became a woman, and a really beautiful one. Maybe the most beautiful one.

I discovered that she is generous, just, friendly, intelligent, funny…ergo a really beautiful person. And at that time I started to feel something different for her, like admiration.

But now, that admiration had changed to something I have never expected to. It became love.

I felt in love with Lily Potter. And now, that's my mistake. Being friend with Lily was quite difficult because her brothers didn't see our friendship like something good. They didn't say anything because I've always displayed to all them that I'll protect Lily no matter what.

But loving her is different. Dating her is different. That goes beyond our means, and I think we can't handle it anymore. And I'm not saying she loves me (because I'm scared like the hell about confessing to her), but if she was, It would be unpredictable to all.

-Are you ok sweet heart? –my mom asked, worried.

I was sitting in a hammock in the garden of my manor, thinking about my life while the summer sun descended in the horizon. I looked to my dear mother's face. She is really sweet and kind, opposite to my father's behavior. She is like a friend to me, because she always tries to help me. But I really didn't know about telling her about my problem. She was still involved in the stories and prejudices of the past.

-Nothing –I said. She pouted me and gave me a sharp look, what made me resign. She was too strong for me –I'm in love.

-Oh! –she smiled to me –And why is that a problem?

-Because she is someone who you won't like and I'm someone who her parents won't like –I said, sorrowful.

-Don't say that –she said –Is she so ugly? –she joked and laughed. But I didn't do anything, so she stopped –Who is she?

-I'm not sure I want to tell you –I said –You won't believe it.

-You're making me feel really curious –she said, dismayed –but ok, you don't have to tell me if you don't want to. But still, why is that a problem? I mean, if you really love her…because you do it, do you?

-Yeah –I said, blushed –Is the first time I feel like I'm worth. She makes me feel alive, full of feelings, she makes me shine.

-But that's beautiful –she said – Scorpius, honey, if someone makes you feel like that, why do we have to hate her? It seems she's gorgeous!

-She is, but…-I said. I really didn't know how to tell her how I feel without revealing that she was a Potter.

-Is she a muggle daughter? –she asked –Because if she is, I have to tell you that there's no problem with it.

-She's not a muggle daughter –I said –she is…known. You know her.

-Honey –she said –knowing her name may help me ho give you some advices. It can't be so bad.

-Lily Potter –I said, finally. Mom remained in silence for a few minutes.

-Wow –she said –wow…I mean…wow.

-I know –I said –But we were friends for a few years.

-You didn't tell me anything about that –she seemed offended.

-I didn't wanted to have problems with dad –I said –And our friendship was very spontaneous, so…

-It's ok honey –she said, smiling –I's quite impressive, but…if she makes you feel like that…I mean, what happened between our generation shouldn't affect yours. We had our differences but still…

-I didn't told her about it –I said –I'm scared –she looked at me –I don't want to lose her, or dad, or you. And I don't know what to do.

She put her hands on my shoulders and smiled to me.

-Dear –she said, kindly –there comes a day when everyone have to take their own way, their own future and destiny. And the only way to do that is walking to it, and your dad and I only can teach you how to walk, and stay with you to help you to get up if you fall down, but we can't walk in your shoes. You have to make your own decisions and nobody can blame you for that.

I looked to her, impressed.

-I…

-Don't worry son –she said –the most important thing now is that she makes you feel all those feelings. That's good, and you should confess to her.

So here I am, sitting in the embrasure of one of the windows of the astronomy tower, observing her while she tells me how was her summer, cause we didn't see each other in the whole holidays. But we wrote to each other every two weeks.

-So James put Al's pants into the smokestack and threw the flu powders to my dad's office. It was really funny! –she laughed –well, I think Al didn't think so –she laughed again –So what did you did this two weeks?

-I was thinking of something really important –I said. She looked to me with a serious face, maybe because I had one too –There is someone who I love and I'm afraid to confess to her.

She seemed puzzled and she put a strange face that I couldn't identify.

-So…you are in love.

-Yeah –I said –But our families can't stand each other. What do you think about it?

She seemed to meditate it a few minutes.

-If you really love her, you should risk and confess –she said, in a breathy voice.

I smirked to her and I went close to her, sitting in front of her in the ground. I gathered my head with hers and she blushed. Same as me.

-I love you –I said. She opened her eyes, really surprised, but she didn't depart from me.

We stood like that in silence for a while, but then I felt like an idiot and I tried to quit, but she took my arm and looked deep into my eyes. Dun to Gray, fire to ice. And then, she kissed me.

It was a sweet and soft touch, but it made me shudder. I looked to her. She was blushed and looking to the ground, embarrassed.

-Do I have to take that as an "I love you too" answer? –I asked. She nodded in silence.

Then, I felt the happiest wizard in the whole world. And I hugged her love, and kissed her, and hugged again. And she only smiled to me, she really seem happy with the situation.

End ~

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Hey there, hope you enjoyed it n_n, so see you soon!

Hugs

K.


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